Tbh it just means me being skinny therefore having absolute control over everything I eat, crave, and feel.

I want to see my ribs and stomach turn concave. I want to shout HA at my old self (I suffered from BED for three to four years??)

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to me it means just loving food but never eating it bc i dont want to gain

its just a black hole you fall into that you can't get out of

the euphoric feeling of controlling what u eat but never actually being in control

 

The physical expression of how I feel emotionally.

And needing to feel in control.

 

It's a way to exert control over at least one thing in my life when everything else feels out of control. It's also a way to satisfy my perfectionistic side and to self punish for not living up to standards I've set for myself. And to express some of my inner sadness on the outside.

 

Interesting.. the feeling of control. I haven't even considered that, but I can see myself wanting more control. Makes sense why I feel defeated when I lose that control.

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It means fitting into the diagnostic criteria in the DSM, but maybe that's not what you asked for

 

It means being perfect because i need to look like the models. Also so that i can start modeling myself. I dunno... To me it is just the constant guilt, control over calories, lying, self loathing. The obsessing that i cant stop. The binging after a long starve. It is sort of my self harm, but also just a way to feel skinny and perfection. It started out as sort of an attention seeking thing bc i felt insecure about my weight and now has become a total obsession , and disorder.

 

Meeting the criteria for the diagnosis

 

Pretty much just meeting the diagnostic criteria, like all other medical/mental-health conditions...​

 

Thanks for the replies everyone. Just curious to see what you guys thought.

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Thanks for the replies everyone. Just curious to see what you guys thought.

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Yeah, no worries. I was diagnosed with anorexia nervosa before my recovery phase that ended up with me eating 2,000 calories a day as instructed, but my doc failed to admit that a person under 5' shouldn't really be eating that much. So while my BMI is currently exactly 21 and not an anorectic BMI, I still have that anorexia nervosa diagnosis and obviously I'm back into my ED behaviors and shit because the weight gain was unmanageable for me.​

Basically, you have anorexia nervosa if a doctor diagnoses you with one, which is usually by criteria found in the newest DSM.​

 

For me it's

- Punishing myself for being a bad person for making mistakes and for simply existing
- being in control of at least my food intake while everything around me is just chaos

 

All it means to me is the diagnostic code that whatever doctor writing my prescriptions at the time puts on the bottom of my chart.

 

I'm not anorexic currently, but I've been diagnosed in the past, so idk if I should answer.

Anyways, having an ED (probably Atypical AN or whatever), means for me

- a coping mechanism for sad shit. (Recently, two of my kitties died )

- a way to control my emotions.

- a way to prove myself that I'm "strong"

- a way to feel better about myself

- a way to not have to deal with reality and how shitty people are

- a way to get skinny and be better than heavier people (I know, it sounds mean, but that's just my thoughts)

- a way to special, different than others. It's part of my identity, which is kinda sad, but whatever.

 

I'm not anorexic currently, but I've been diagnosed in the past, so idk if I should answer.

Anyways, having an ED (probably Atypical AN or whatever), means for me
- a coping mechanism for sad shit. (Recently, two of my kitties died )
- a way to control my emotions.
- a way to prove myself that I'm "strong"
- a way to feel better about myself
- a way to not have to deal with reality and how shitty people are
- a way to get skinny and be better than heavier people (I know, it sounds mean, but that's just my thoughts)
- a way to special, different than others. It's part of my identity, which is kinda sad, but whatever.

I'm sorry about your cats.

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I'm sorry about your cats.

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Thanks ♥

They were such cuties.

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Thanks

They were such cuties.

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Oh my gosh. SO ADORABLE ahh. ️

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I think that answering this question is important, because I just read that even people with this problems, or even in this forum, are like "there are fake ana people" and I'm like "who are you to look down on their feelings?"
Having an ED (ana, mia, even eating too much it's an ED), for me is that you can't think anything else but food

 

For me its the one thing I'm good at. As a kid I was the most average athlete and student. The one thing I feel like I can do better than other people is losing weight. I feel awful but in my head I laugh when people complain how they can't seem to lose weight. In a weird sick way it makes me feel better about myself that at least I can do one thing right

 

I think that answering this question is important, because I just read that even people with this problems, or even in this forum, are like "there are fake ana people" and I'm like "who are you to look down on their feelings?"
Having an ED (ana, mia, even eating too much it's an ED), for me is that you can't think anything else but food

Yeah! That one thread going on today about people with high bmi not having a disorder.. definitely did not agree with that person. Shaking my head.

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being aware of what I put in my mouth, and the accomplishment of knowing I successfully controlled myself at the end of the day feels amazing...

especially because for about ~3 years I was a mess in everything in life... I had absolutely no impulse control in anything. ana has just been one aspect of a sudden shift to total control in recent months.

it's strange because I don't really know what brought this change on. my biggest fear is reverting back to how I used to be.