Lightheadedness, back and chest soreness, sore jaw, acne, and an overall sense of doom. My stomach got pretty raw the other day which made me feel ill, and purging gave me diarrhea for some reason.

 

Op you just described the reason why I b/p lol

I don’t want to think. I want my head to stfu for once and cooking, binging and purging does the trick (and sleep but I have insomnia and can’t sleep over 7 hours anyway)

I’ve asked my husband does he think all the time. Like does he have so much thoughts in his head 24/7 that it is almost like being in a room with 67 loudly talking people? No? Okay I guess I’m on to something...
This crowd of people shut up when I focus on food and eating. I think part of it is bc of actual hunger —> ur body drives you insane looking for food and stops screaming when you have the food and also goves you massive amount of hormones that make you feel good, what a prize! The brainfog is so calming and addictive.

 

Yeah, but I would be so stressed that I binged that I'd spin into 103939 panic attacks and won't calm down until I go purge and get it out of me. After the purge I'm usually just sleepy, but I'll go for a short walk and then just rest for the rest of the day lol. But I'll be feeling much more lightheaded that way, yeah my face looks gross, my heart hurts, and I'm cold but I'm calm? tired and just at peace with myself for a couple of hours, I can actually do some stuff normally without thinking much and then baam!! HUuuunger kicks in, I go into panic mode, start overthinking, cry lol, binge purge and so on.. it's a circle, tightly locked😐

 

Yes that's exactly what happens basically every time I BP lol. It's like I dissociate and forget the time and everything else going on right now I completely zone out and just eat, stuff myself until full purge eat again repeat for hours. If I wouldn't take pictures of my food (for the binge haul thread lol) I genuinely can't remember what I actually ate like my brain goes off when I start eating it's just me and the food and "nothing else matters". Suddenly 5 hours are over and I swear it felt like a few minutes tops it's super weird. But I like it I BP so I can dissociate and forget about all my problems and just stop thinking for once. I can't live without having these sessions at least once every few days so I feel like I'll never be able to stop BPing because I just need to dissociate.

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To be honest, I wish the nothing going on in the head feeling happened a lot more!

I don't have the tons of voices problem, just the I can't stop thinking about the same things problem. Alcohol and the b/p "zone" I get it in is the only thing that helps, other than sleep... when I can