Eating Disorder Support Forum banner
  • This website may include conversations, media, and content around topics relating to eating disorders, trauma, addiction, and mental health. Please be aware that this content may be upsetting, difficult, or triggering for some. EDSF is intended as a place of safety. If you or someone you know is struggling with an eating disorder, Feast-ED.org is a resource that lists the organizations set up to help.

I want to be sterile like a robot :: What can I eat that’s clean?

816 views 7 replies 4 participants last post by  Fleabag.era 
#1 ·
This might not even be ortho, I really don’t know because I haven’t seen anyone for my eating disorder since I was a teenager (I’m 27 now). But I spend all my free time reading about robots, watching futuristic tv shows, browsing pinterest and saving pins that look clean and plastic and sterile. I know I have ocd, but for me its really anxiety based and my need to feel clean and real. Every time I go to the store I freak out scanning everything with Yuka to see how toxic it is, if it’ll make my insides dirty, and usually leave with just about nothing. I do this and under eat until I lose control and binge on junk food from the minimart because I’m starving and then I have to take shower after shower scrubbing myself to feel clean again. I fast after binges until I’m SURE all of the poison is out of me too.

I just want to be and feel clean. If a company approached me asking if I’d like to be part of a trial experiment where they transferred consciousness into a robot body made of plastic and electronics, I’d sign my soul away faster than I could blink. Anything to get out of this nasty prison where anyone can touch my skin and I can’t get clean inside and everything that fuels it also kills it.

Is there any type of futuristic diet that’s trending right now? Anything that’s like a nutritional paste that‘s only ground up vitamins and calories, nothing more and doesn’t have any toxic additives in it? I’m really at the end here, if there anything at all like a smoothie or paste that’s JUST the essentials, I would buy it asap. Any suggestions would help tremendously, it wouldn’t be encouraging me, it would be helping tremendously so I could stop freaking out about what’s going into my body. Please help!
 
See less See more
#2 ·
im really sorry to hear your struggling so much :((( i’ve definetly been there and while i’m not sure 100% how your ed is i think you could try vitamin c shots (packets that you put water in and drink), matcha with organic milk, smoothies you blend on your own, and green juice. those are the only liquid clean diets i can think of, but drinking lots of greens yes. for me personally i drink chia and flax seeds and it makes me feel that i am scrubbing my insides clean and also helps bowel movements. i hope things get easier for you ❤‍🔥
 
#4 ·
im really sorry to hear your struggling so much :((( i’ve definetly been there and while i’m not sure 100% how your ed is i think you could try vitamin c shots (packets that you put water in and drink), matcha with organic milk, smoothies you blend on your own, and green juice. those are the only liquid clean diets i can think of, but drinking lots of greens yes. for me personally i drink chia and flax seeds and it makes me feel that i am scrubbing my insides clean and also helps bowel movements. i hope things get easier for you ❤‍🔥
Thank you, I’ll try chia and flax drinks. I’ve never tried those vitamin c shots but I really want to now. Definitely anything that can help me get some more nutrients/vitamins would help
 
#5 ·
I'm not sure how helpful this would be but maybe try a liquid diet for a little while if solids are making you feel this way? Soups, protein shakes etc perhaps? Also take a good quality multivitamin ❤
I do take a b-complex vitamin every day that helps a ton with feeling too tired or worn out. Mostly this last week I’ve been consuming mostly liquids and its really making me feel better because solids for some reason make me feel gross. Although my goal today is to go to a restaurant and get takeout. I tried this morning but freaked myself out too much about possible contamination (not wearing gloves, what kind of oil/grease they might use, what ingredients they use, etc) so I went back home. But later today I’m going to walk to a place and try again
 
#7 ·
I thought I was the only one wishing there was human kibble 🤣 or like a perfect, clean, ethically sourced meal replacement drink powder so I never have to think about food just eat. Most packaged stuff has bad ingredients and fresh stuff is so perishable and covered in pesticides, rat feces and grubby hands.

There are some good shake mixes and protein bars you could try though. But I'm with you on trying some new diet where you are just like infused with nutrition or swallow a pill 3x a day and be done with it. 👍
 
#8 ·
Human kibble 💀 really tho, that’s exactly what I’m looking for. My list of “safe” foods is so small but I did find a protein shake that passes all my checks. I‘ve been drinking the “cookies and creamless” thing from owyn bc I found it at the store by accident. I scanned it on Yuka and it says it doesn’t have any preservative/additives in it. For fruit I tend to shop at the farmer’s market at my university but I scrub the hell out of anything I get in case there’s pesticides. God I’d kill for human kibble tho lmao
 
This is an older thread, you may not receive a response, and could be reviving an old thread. Please consider creating a new thread.
Top