Eating Disorder Support Forum banner
  • This website may include conversations, media, and content around topics relating to eating disorders, trauma, addiction, and mental health. Please be aware that this content may be upsetting, difficult, or triggering for some. EDSF is intended as a place of safety. If you or someone you know is struggling with an eating disorder, Feast-ED.org is a resource that lists the organizations set up to help.

~accountability~

353 views 5 replies 1 participant last post by  violet_turning_violet 
#1 ·
Hi! I’m Violet!
I’m totally new to the site, so bare with me. I’m not completely sure that I have it figured out lol.
Anyway, it’s time for a fresh start! About four years ago, I lost 50 lbs in just a couple months through low restriction. I wasn’t even happy with my body then, but was able to keep the weight off for awhile without gaining. Though, I still had about 20 lbs til my goal. Since then, I’ve gained about 10 lbs (not too bad!!) through a longgg binge-restrict period. I’m now realizing that I just cant keep up with extremely low restriction without eventually bingeing. So, for now, at 5’0 120 lbs, my goal is to eat around 1000-1200 calories/day. I’ll see how that goes for a bit. I’m sure I’ll need to experiment a bit to figure out the perfect range. My problem is that whenever I try to restrict in a higher range, I end up going way too low and wearing myself out. It’s hard to push myself to that 1000-1200 range when I could easily fast, but I know high restriction works out better in the long run.
Thanks for reading!! I’ll update tomorrow and see how it went! Weigh ins will be on Sundays!
 
#2 ·
Day one done!!
alright! it was a somewhat successful day. I ended up having 1,140 cals, which is within my goal of 1,000-1200, but it still feels super high. It’s okay, though. I just have to get used to high res.
Also, I decided that since I’m not able to weigh myself until Sunday (because I have to pick up new batteries for my scale lol) I’m going to wait until then til i “officially” start. I’m still high restricting tomorrow and Saturday, but Sunday is when I’m gonna get my official starting weight. I guessed yesterday when I said 120. I might be a little more than that honestly.
Anyway, I’m feeling optimistic! Not too hungry to the point where I feel like I might eventually binge, but also no where near full.
I might eventually start implementing some lower res days just so I can feel a little better. High res is super rough mentally. But first I just wanna see how the first official week goes from Sunday-Sunday. It’s killingggg me not knowing my weight.
 
#3 ·
Okay! Day 2 lol
I can already feel myself getting antsy and wanting to speed up the process by eating less, but i know what that always results in. I haven’t even fixed my scale yet/gotten a new one. Once I have my starting weight I can experiment for a week and see how 1,000-1200 goes, until then I’m just gonna keep doing what I’m doing. Feeling bored. 1,150 for today. Could’ve done so much better :/
 
#4 ·
Day 3!!
I’m moving weigh in day to Monday bc I can’t pick up the stuff for my scale until tomorrow afternoon. Seriously a bummer. But it actually works out bc I ate like 500 extra calories today ( kill me) because I was at work and about to collapse. It’s alright, though I’m trying to stay positive. Tomorrow I’m just gonna subtract 500 from my max. So my max is usually 1200, but tomorrow it’ll be 700. Idk what about today was so rough. I think it’s because I drank so many of my calories, and I think I started my day off with too much sugar and ended up spiking my insulin, which resulted in a big drop and left me feeling super weak and miserable. Lesson learned. I’m gonna try starting the day with like toast or nuts or something rather than a pop tart and a sugary latte. Not sure what I was thinking today, god. It’s alright. Anyway, trying to look ahead instead of dwelling on today too much. It really wasn’t THAT bad considering how much movement I was doing at work. :/ it’s okay. Tomorrow will be better.
 
#5 ·
Okay minor update

like I actually suck because Sunday I was UNBELIEVABLY depressed and unable to leave my apartment. but anyways hopefully I can pickup the batteries after work tomorrow. Also Ive slipped up these past couple days. AM I EVEN GONNA BE ABLE TO DO THIS. Restriction used to be so easy. Kill me.
 
#6 ·
Happy Sunday!!
just checking in to say that I haven’t deviated from my plan since my last update, ive just been super busy and still haven’t managed to get a scale lol. Still a priority for me, but things have just been crazy with working a full time job while going to school and stuff. So anyway I haven’t given up!! Things are going well! It would be super helpful to be able to measure my progress with a scale, though, so I’ll be getting on that any day now.
 
This is an older thread, you may not receive a response, and could be reviving an old thread. Please consider creating a new thread.
Top