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  1. Anorexia Discussions
    Wish my weight wasn't still monitored so I could use all the nasty recovery weight. Got called "not that thin" on Thursday at BMI 15.9 and here's the story: I have an internship as a media specialist atm. There was a native English speaker (I live in Austria btw), 64 years old and from Texas...
  2. Public Blogs
    This thread is going to be updated weekly (should I remain consistent instead of isolating myself) on how my ED is progressing, whether for better or worse. Updates may be long or short depending on the events that happen. I will not mention weight numerically or my body measurements here, but...
  3. Anorexia Discussions
    I’m so angry at this illness for taking everything from me and my family. I’m so angry that after months of treatment I still can’t cope. I’m so angry at everyone who glamorised this to teenaged me who only wanted to feel okay. I’m so angry because I don’t want to relapse. i’m so angry because...
  4. Starting at a higher BMI
    Haven't posted here in a while because I've been in an almost year-long binge/restrict cycle and I started chewing aluminum (yay PICA!). Gained back almost to my sw and now my family thinks I'm "happier and healthier" (but apparently I can still gain some more weight?) ... My teeth and I feel...
  5. Anorexia Discussions
    I'm ngl the lightheaded feeling I get makes me feel so euphoric. Like this whole disorder makes me feel other worldly. For awhile, it exhausted me but now I've come to enjoy it. This is so corny but honestly everything about dealing with this disorder is corny. I'm addicted to this feeling in a...
  6. EDNOS Discussions
    Been in a miserable never ending binge phase since christmas, and was binging frequently from about last summer. Got the courage to weigh myself this morning and I've gained 16lbs in the past month. 44 in the past year; I'm 5'2 and 119lbs and it SHOWS. I feel so disgusting, I went from solidly...
  7. Anorexia Discussions
    About a year ago I went to a really high cliff at a fjord where a lot of people take pictures near the edge. Everyone was a bit fearful tho and keeps a good distance from the edge, because if you fall you won't be able to tell the story. Me however, thought it would be cool to actually sit on...
  8. BED Discussions
    Ugh, ive fasted for 60hrs twice over the past 2 weeks and finally hit my lw of 48kg, i was SOO happy and due to upcoming holidays with my family i wanted to get back to eating 'normally to try maintain and not mess up my metabolism or whatever - i wont be able to fast regularly in Feb as im...
  9. Bulimia Discussions
    Today after nearly two weeks completely binge and purge free, I was starting to feel normal, calm, peacefull, free. Then my father said something so foul that triggered something wild in me... I don't know where that anger came from, I didn't know my body could yell that loud. I quite litterally...
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