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  1. Games
    This may sound odd, but what are the smells you equate to your eating disorder? For example, some of mine are: Vanilla Coffee The chocolaty, nutty scent of Nutella spread The way the air smells in autumn at six AM - cold, wet, earthy I thought the question "what does your eating disorder...
  2. Public Blogs
    Back at it Hi there unknown and most certainly non existent reader ! I'm back on the website after years of "feeling better" or at least convincing myself I was feeling better. My life has been pretty much awful : I lost people due to illness both mental and physical, I lost some friends due...
  3. EDNOS Discussions
    SO. it's been a while since i last posted lmao hello again this time however i actually have a good announcement to make. i've been back on my shit and since managing to get back up to 132.2lbs on january 1st after a binge i am now at 118.8lbs. still a long way to go to my ugw but i've finally...
  4. Games
    I was going through my search history on my phone, making sure to delete some things, since my mother sometimes has a tendency to take my phone, and I realized just how many ED-related searches I've made recently, so I thought I'd make a little game out of it. What is, as of this moment, in your...
  5. The Happy Place
    At my mother's urging, (she's friends with them), I'm playing a little prank on the family I rent my basement apartment from. I was upstairs keeping an eye on their dog, like I do almost every weekday, and Mom told me I should set an alarm on their Alexa speaker to wake them up at some weird...
  6. The Happy Place
    This is a random post, I know, but it was on my mind tonight. What are some small things you like to hear people say to you? I don't mean the usual "you're looking so thin!", either. ;) Specifically, I like it when my mother tells me my apartment smells nice. Having a physical disability...
  7. Movies and TV Shows
    I actually really like horror movies, but, being a Christian, (though not the "traditional" type), there are certain films I avoid. I started watching the 2012 film "The Possession" this afternoon, even though it isn't my typical fare. The movie opens up on an ornate box, and you hear music...
  8. Fasting and Cleansing
    When my ED was at its worst, I lost pretty much all my weight through long-term (for me) fasting. This meant going on weeklong fasts semi-regularly, and one ten-day fast. I lived with my father during this time, and since he worked sort of late, we would often have fast food dinner, which he...
  9. EDNOS Discussions
    At this moment, I am eating my first food of the day - a Sargento Balanced Breaks snack pack, that has little drops of peanut butter in it. I'm not sure why, but the moment I tasted one of those peanut butter drops, it immediately reminded me of getting up super early as a kid, to go to the...
  10. EDNOS Discussions
    Do you have any ED behaviors you engage in that you actually dislike, but have a difficult time stopping? When my ED first began, at fourteen, I got it into my head that eating after midnight meant the day would be "ruined", so to speak, so I obviously stopped eating after midnight. Then, a few...
  11. Movies and TV Shows
    I love a lot of ED movies and shows. "Feed" doesn't tend to be a favorite of people, but I relate to it, in a weird way. I'm watching it again tonight, remembering why it's so relatable to me, and why I can't watch it very often because of it. Unlike the movie, I don't have a twin who died...
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