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  1. Starting at a higher BMI
    I am 225 lbs and 5'5. I am so mad I ruined my body so badly. I was 237 a few weeks ago. I am terrified of having loose skin but I do not want to be obease. I was using eating as a defense mechanism when I was taking care of my sick grandpa. I was 139 lbs in 2018. I was overweight before but I am...
  2. Anorexia Discussions
    I'm fasting once a day in the week and usually doing intermittent fasting or omad. Lately I'm getting really agressive at people eating (probably because I can't) but I also hate the sounds of them chewing, gulping food super fast down or anything related like talking about take-out and good...
  3. Anorexia Discussions
    Dear lord, I've been trying to lose the SAME FUCKING 2kgs for A YEAR NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!! So my birthday is at the end of the month and I need help losing some weight... When I say "help" I mean either a strict plan or a slap in the face. I'm a fucking failure and I've got the rolls to show it. I...
  4. Bulimia Discussions
    Whenever I've purged, for the remainder of the day and often for several days thereafter I feel somewhat...mentally comprised. My personality is almost unrecognisable - I'm more stressed, suicidal, irritable, angry, and mean (horribly so) than usual. I just seem to hate the world, and myself...
  5. Anorexia Discussions
    so, i have come across this stupid (imo) conclusion, that the majority of folks with an eating disorder (especially AN) hate... food? i mean, it doesn't really makes sense to me. fear of weight gain, hence, the "disgust" that comes with every single bite of your meal, but... isn't that you...
  6. Anorexia Discussions
    I visited my family a couple weeks ago and my dad told me I look healthy with a 'nice glow.' Idk why but it just made me feel so bad, like I'm not thin enough. Because I know 'healthy' is used as a way to acknowledge that someone is of a bigger size / has gained weight. I'd rather they just not...
  7. EDS Book Club
    What are some books you genuinely hate? I love reading, and I can often find some redeeming quality in any book I read, but there have been three books in my life (so far) that I hate, through and through. "The Scarlet Letter", "The Burn Journals" and "The Miseducation of Cameron Post". I read...
  8. EDNOS Discussions
    What are some things your ED has made you dislike or hate? We all know the usuals - mirrors, clothes shopping, etc. - but do you have anything that might not being considered "usual"? I absolutely dread taking Tums now. I hate the texture and the way they feel in my mouth, and how they tend to...
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