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  1. Anorexia Discussions
    6mo of low res strct eating gone out the window today all because I didn't time my meals accordingly and became overly hungry due to not eating at all until 2pm due to various earnings I had to run witch resulted in me indulging on McDonald's fries and chicken nuggets. I've never purged before...
  2. Anorexia Discussions
    I mean depression as in the medically/clinically/severe depression not just the occasional feelings of sadness. I'm wondering bc I DO have depression but it's not as bad as it used to be when I was at my lw and recovery after that (thank God for lamictal) but I feel like as I'm low-key going...
  3. BED Discussions
    can someone tell me if they relate. i just feel like i feel nothing. i ate cheese today which i'm not happy about and then i went to the supermarket with a straight face, bought food and two liters of diet coke, numbly returned home, and now i'm eating the food. i try to "scare" myself by...
  4. Anorexia Discussions
    Tw to start, I guess. I just feel tired of existing. Not just with the eating disorder but in general. I am so tired of living. I feel so numb to everything, aside from anxiety and the crippling feeling of depression. I always feel like everyone hates me and that I am such a burden to everyone...
  5. Anorexia Discussions
    I have a horrid habit of chewing and spitting. Not used as a way to binge but because I get too scared to swallow certain (well, most) foods once the time comes. However, this is truly a gross and disgusting thing I want to stop. I also worry it is impeding losing weight. Feels like I've been...
  6. Anorexia Discussions
    Not new to depression or ED, but I've been getting hit hard with depression lately which has completely zapped even the motivation of an appetite. It's making people worry for me again because I lost weight again; I feel like I could keep at least some intake if I wasn't so deep in this pit that...
  7. Anorexia Discussions
    um yeah, just curious cuz i'm discussing medications with my psychiatrist on monday! are there and anxiety, depression, or ocd meds that make you lose? (or at least don't make you gain?) i'm a little bit terrified, but i literally just won't take it if it'll make me gain!!!
  8. Public Blogs
    First Entry I'm new to MPA and I thought it might be fun to keep a blog since I have the option. My goal currently is to trigger myself and cause a relapse. I've been stable for almost a year, but my ED thoughts are coming back. A year ago I was underweight, and I want to get back to where...
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